Wednesday, February 27, 2008

"Save my soul, the board of education took away my parole"

Woe is me, all "maternity leave" I was happy and free.
Save my soul, the board of education took away my parole.
I gotta go back, back, back to school again.
You won't find me 'til the clock strikes three; I'm gonna be there 'til then...
I gotta go back, back, back to school again.
Whoa, whoa, I gotta go... back to school again!
Grease 2 The Four Tops
Eliza Marie
9/18/07
I always think about how much Eliza has changed in five months. However, going back to work made me realize how much I have changed over the last five months. I am a mom now and my life will never be the safe. I had no idea when I held Eliza on the day she was born how much she would rock my world. But she did and now my perspective on life has changed and that will effect everything I undertake. The past five months with my daughter have been challenging and rewarding at the same time. She has taught me about strength, love and selflessness. She has made me a better person- stronger and wiser in so many ways.

Today was my first day back to work. I am home a little early because there was a mix up and I don't officially start until tomorrow. However, I did stay with my class for a couple of hours. Everything went really well. Eliza did good with my mom. Shockingly I was not as upset as I thought I would be. I don't know if that is good or bad. When I got home Eliza was so happy to see me. She was smiling and laughing and it made me feel good. Now that I have gone back my anxiety is gone. It is the fear of the unknown that makes me stressed. I was anxious all day yesterday and by last night I was cool as a cucumber because I realized the one thing that really matters is my family. As long as I can come home and look into the beautiful face of my daughter I will be OK.
I want to thank everyone who supported me through this transition. I really appreciate all of the kind words and phone calls. It really meant a lot to me ad I kept thinking about what everyone said when I started to get upset. Thank YOU!!!! One day down...
In the words of my favorite leading lady Scarlett O'Hara
"After all... tomorrow is another day. "

7 comments:

Melissa said...

She was such a pretty pretty newborn!

Lori said...

yay! glad to hear it went well... and you got a transition day for all of you. Just remember your daughter will know you love her and you can then spread that love and caring to so many other young children who need it too!

Anonymous said...

It's nice that you had a chance to ease into things.

I also felt good about going back to work. I love Becca but I also enjoy what I do.

I hope tomorrow goes as well as today.

Pam said...

What beautiful pictures! Glad to hear you are feeling better and the first day (even if you first official day isn't until tomorrow) went well. Keep us posted!
I'll be thinking of you!

Anonymous said...

Beautifully written...you've captured a lot of what I felt when I went back. How blessed are you to have your Mom take care of Eliza? That is so wonderful! Love the song!

Anonymous said...

Congratulations! I'm so glad things went well. You've survived one of the hardest transitions (so I hear). Keep up the good work!

Jen

Laski said...

So glad it went well. I can imagine how tough it is, but you are right: "It is the fear of the unknown that makes me stressed."

BTW, Eliza is beautiful . . . what a sweet face.

And you--a good mom! Be proud. And just think, you have the thought of coming home to that adorable baby to get you through those trying days in the classroom . . .