Jude's Birth Story

I did it! I truly feel I took back the birth experience this time around. Everything about this labor and delivery (except for my battle scar 4th degree tear) went better than I could have imagined. Right before I was getting ready to push I actually suggested to Pete that I might be dreaming and I was scared I was going to wake up. It turns out I wasn't dreaming-but I ended up with one dreamy little boy!

When I woke up Monday morning I had an off feeling. I had a very dull backache and felt crampy in general. This had happened before so I figured it was probably nothing. I had some cramping and contractions on and off all morning but they subsided when I took a nap with E. After we woke up I squatted down to help E on the potty and felt a gush. I didn't think it was my water but wasn't sure so I called the doctor and of course she wanted me to go to labor and delivery for a check. I was very annoyed. I knew going in meant they might try to get me to stay. I had NO intentions of spending the day laboring in the hospital.

When I arrived at the hospital they hooked me up and then lectured me about not drinking enough water because I was contracting quite a bit. However, it wasn't anything regular so I wasn't concerned. They also told me that if my water had broke I would have to stay. When I asked why- they said because I had to have my baby. I responded that it was taco night and I planned on having tacos and not a baby. The doctor came and and instead of checking my water with the speculum and litmus test, she just bopped the baby around a few times, said he felt buoyant and there were no more gushes. Since my bag was still intact I was sent home smiling and ready to eat some tacos. I was 3cm dilated.

I went home and made some tacos. I was contracting a little more steadily but was thinking it might subside. I drank some of the laborade I had whipped up that morning. I wanted to stay hydrated just in case I went into labor.

At around eight o'clock I ate three yummalicious tacos. I was having contractions about every five minutes. I was tired and figured the contractions would stop when I went to sleep so I went to try and get some rest. I soon realized that the contractions were probably not stopping and that I was most likely going to have a baby soon. I had Pete time a few contractions just to see how far apart they were and how long they were in duration. They were averaging 5-6 minutes apart and were about 45 seconds long from the start to the peak. I decided to try and get some rest and see how things progressed before calling the doctor.

The contractions grew more intense over the next few hours. I tried to get some rest, took two showers, listened to my hypnobirthing CD, scrubbed down the kitchen, went on the computer, and did some belly dancing to pass the time. The contraction were still about 3-4minutes apart and only about 45 seconds long. I was expecting them to be close to 60 seconds long by this time and felt like I was puttering. I was getting very tired and worried at this point. At about one thirty I woke Peter up to help me out. I told him to call his mom to come over and stay with Eliza. I called the doctor at 2 a.m. and told her my stats. She said it was up to me when I wanted to come to the hospital. She said don't deliver in the car and if I come in before six go through E.R. At around 2:30 Pete and I decided to take a walk around my development to get things moving. It was a beautiful night outside. We walked around the development once, stopping when I had a contraction so that I could lean on Pete for support. We then decided to head toward the hospital and maybe walk around the town surrounding the hospital for a bit. Since the hospital is a 30 minute drive we figured it would be better to be close just in case.

At this point I really had no idea how many cm I was dilated. I was expecting the contractions to be coming much closer. I was in a great deal of discomfort-but was using my past experience with pitocin induced contractions as a reference point. As we packed the car to go to the hospital I realized that I was losing my sense of humor and starting to feel very serious. In my Bradley book i had read to watch out for different emotional sign posts and knew i was probably farther than i realized. We decided to head straight to the hospital. I was estimating that I was dilated about 5cm. and was hoping to spend some time in the tub.

After what was probably the most uncomfortable car ride ever-we arrived at the hospital around 4. They receptionists said I didn't look like I was really in the thick of it yet. As I sat in the wheel chair my legs and hands starting to shake and I though my tacos were going to end up everywhere. I told Pete that i was so exhausted I didn't know if I could go natural. I didn't think I had any more energy left. This doubt is a common emotional sign post for laboring women as well although i didn't recognize it at the time. Pete suggested we wait and see how many cm I was dilated before making any decisions. They hooked me up to the monitor, I told them my pain scale rating was a five (I was delirious) and the doctor did an internal exam.

He told me I was 8cm dilated and my exact reaction was, "Shut Up!" I couldn't believe I was already 8 cm. I knew at that point that I had to go natural. They asked about an epidural and I said, nope! They wheeled me to the delivery room.

The doctor asked if I wanted my menbrane ruptured. I was hesitant but exhausted so I said OK. When she went to break my water I was 10cm and almost ready to push. What? Shut up again.

I really felt like I was in a dream. I couldn't believe I was ready to push. Everyone was pretty amped that I was not getting any drugs. I think I was the only mom giving birth at the time and had lots of support.

I pushed for forty minutes. It was so incredibly different than pushing with an epidural. The best was I can describe the experience is painful but amazing. I actually experienced everything. i felt his passage and it was awesome. I doubted myself quite a bit and at times had to struggle to find strength. I focused on Eliza and all the moms and moms to be that I know- the ones that inspired me and the ones that I hoped to inspire.

Jude was born at 5:49 a.m.. I just couldn't believe I had a boy. I was so sure it was a girl. I was exhausted but elated. The labor was truly an awesome experience. The only sore spot- ahem- is that I tore badly. I have a fourth degree tear that think it could have been prevented but I am not going to dwell on it when everything else went so beautifully.

So that is the story of how my little Jude made his way into the world and how I learned the true capabilities of my body and my mind.