Thursday, September 10, 2009

Why am I so Whacked?

Today I went to the breastfeeding mother's group at the lactation consultant office. I actually made it to group without getting lost. This is a major accomplishment for me. Last time the GPS basically gave up on me. This week i went a different way and told the GPS no funny business. Everyone is really good at something. I finally figured out I excel at getting lost. I rock!

It was mostly new mom's and I was having flashbacks listening to them talk. Lots of anxiety! Now that is something I know about. I shook my head up and down in agreement so often my neck is sore. It felt good realizing I am not alone in being a basket case!

Here is a perfect example of how my screwy mind works. I had Jude weighed. According to their scale he is up 2lbs and 4oz from his birth weight. I am now convinced the scale was not at zero when they put him on. I am whacked. It is like I can't allow myself to believe I am doing ok with breastfeeding- because the minute I think I am successful-something will go terribly wrong.

6 comments:

Nikki said...

I've totally been there! :) Your 'wackiness' will wear off... :)

Lori: Teacher Turned Mommy said...

you are doing better. when things are tough it is hard to see the positives

H.E.Eigler said...

Hang in there! The first month or two of BF were the hardest days of my life. You'll survive and so will your babe :) It sounds like you're doing well to me!

Sheri said...

Don't feel bad, I rented a scale and weighed Noah after each feeding. I finally realized that I was driving myself crazy. You already sound like you are starting to come out of the "newborn fog". I really think that it makes us lose brain cells.

Christy said...

Don't second guess yourself. You are doing this! In another month, you'll be an old pro:)

Marcy said...

God, I so remember being there!! You are most definitely not alone in how you're feeling. Again, this, too, shall pass, and I KNOW you are rocking at breastfeeding, and rocking as a mom of 2. Hoping it starts feeling easier for you soon.