I am melting quicker than snow...

Last night I had a mini meltdown...

It was about 7:20 when I got the text saying the hubs wouldn't be home until 8:00. That is thirty minutes later then normal.

I don't know what is was: my hormones, being inside for 72 hours straight, Eliza's frequent meltdowns, the knowledge that this is only the beginning of my husband's busy season.Whatever the reason, I just started crying. I just sat on the rug, stacked blocks with E and cried. and I just kept thinking 13 hours is just too long to be alone every day.

Hubs walked in at eight to find me a blubbering mess. Then I got more upset because I didn't want him to interpret my feelings incorrectly. I don't want him to think I am not happy staying home with Eliza. I am so happy to be home with her. I am just lonely a lot of the time. and you know how men are...problem solvers. He wants to solve my problem and I just don't see an easy solution.

I have a theory. I have shared it with my husband numerous times. I think it is unnatural to be alone, isolated from other humans all day-especially when caring for children. And here we are hidden away in our houses all going crazy. The winter is especially hard for me. I am not joking when I say I am seriously close to talking to inanimate objects.


I feel weak. I feel like I should be able to handle this without going crazy. It really makes me feel inadequate. I know that other moms are doing the same thing without the tears.

So why am I the only one talking to my toaster?